abah

they promised me love, they said they were true,

hey showed me happiness, and i thought it was, too,

they whispered they’d stick around, they said they will,

they told me to fight the world, so i blindly go downhill.

and you warned me not to, and you reminded me all,

foolish as i was, i remained wrong yet i stood tall,

so we fought and talked back and we just didn’t speak,

all for the sake of my immature thought that I had grown big.

when everyone says “i love you-s”, i melted and proud,

but when we talk—all i can give is shout; and more shouts,

i long for love from others, when i have a mountain from you,

i guess i am not that smart as i thought—i guess you knew.

maybe i was jealous of my brother, maybe i wanted to be a son,

maybe i was just being silly, but maybe i want to be your only one,

maybe that’s why i believed what they had lied to me,

maybe that’s what i want to believe—instead of being sorry.

and then came the day when they all just disappeared,

i was left with all deceits—frustrated and lonely, i feared—

all you said became true, everything you warned happened,

i felt dead, i felt stupid, i felt useless out of that sudden.

surprisingly when everything went bad and disastrous,

and when i thought you’d kill me as you were so monstrous,

what shed me to tears was you were the only man behind,

giving your strength to support me physical and mind.

you are my only love, my only man, my only soulmate,

you love me to the seventh sky even though you had never said,

yes, we fought and stop talking and then we back to okay,

but only you , abah, who deserves this little girl’s father’s day.

i love you, more than i have loved anyone else.